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Episode 454: Face 2 Face: April Foods' Day
"Face 2 Face: April Foods' Day" was originally released April 8, 2019. Description We apologize to the city of San Jose for how many pranks we did on this episode, in which we celebrated the Great Pranking Day while recording a live show. If you want to be similarly pranked, good news! This episode also has details on the Become the Monster tour, coming (maybe) to a city near you! Outline 0:45–The boys went to the Winchester Mystery House. There were weird stairs and a servant's quarters/storage closet. 6:24–Riddle Me Piss Avoid me and you'll live. Look at me and you'll die. Who am I? The Bird Box monster 9:49–I was downtown a few weeks ago with my boyfriend. As I was walking, a tall man shoveled past us going the other direction. He bumped into me and mumbled, "give me all your money.", made quick eye contact, and kept going. He didn't even stop to take the money. Did I get mugged? –Slightly Shell Shocked in Santa Cruz 13:45–Y–Sent in by Graham Roebuck, from Yahoo Answers user Roy, who asks: My son has a microwave in his room? My son is ten and I found a microwave in his room while cleaning. It has a $10 sticker from Salvation Army. It's one of those old dial microwaves with a bell in it. It is plugged in and just sitting on his desk. What would a ten-year-old have a microwave for? I don't want him to think I'm not respecting his privacy, so I just want to know if it's anything bad before I talk to him about it. 17:50–For my job, I take care of four large robots - Tweety, Sylvester, Merlin, and Da Vinci. Most of the time they're good robots, but they also have a tendency to drop things, thus halting the day's work if no one is watching them. That means I end up sitting in front of them, just watching them go, in case something goes wrong, but this also means I'm sitting alone in a corner on my phone looking like I'm not working for most of the day. How do I convince my coworkers that robot babysitting is a valid part of my job and I'm not just wasting time?–Robot Wrangler in Richmond 21:21–Y Jr.–Sent in by Michelle, from Yahoo Answers user Sir Fractious, who asks: Do you ever buy raspberries and think "this fruit reminds me of Spider-Man"? 22:57–Y–Sent in by Allie, from Yahoo Answers user NONAME, who asks: People used to call me "dude". Now they call me "sir". Why? 26:51–My boyfriend and I recently moved into a new condo. We were very lucky because the previous owner replaced all of the appliances before selling, including adding a built-in wine cooler. But here's the problem: Neither of us likes wine. In fact, we both hate it. What should we use our wine cooler for since it won't be cooling wine any time soon?–Drawing a Sauvignon Blanc 31:02–Munch Squad–April Foods' Day * 7-Eleven–Avocado Toast Slurpee * Checkers/Rally's–Unseasoned Fries * Dunkin'–donut so big you can use it as a coffee cup holder * Hardee's–hiring a CBO (Chief Biscuit Officer) * Jersey Mike's–Stack Sub (two subs on top of each other) * McDonald's Australia–McPickle Burger (a burger that's nothing but pickles) * McDonald's Canada–McNugget Singles * McDonald's Germany–Big Mac flavored smoothie * McDonald's–Shake Sauce for fries * Oreo–cookie where the cream is on the outside and the cookie's in the middle * Carl's Jr.–Vape Cup (when you drink your soda you also get vape) * Pop Tarts Ravioli * Red Lobster Twizzlers Straws * Stonefire Grill–getting rid of breadsticks 39:00–MZ–Sponsored by MeUndies, Quip. Become the Monster Tour announcement. Advertisement for We Got This. 44:34–Y Jr.–Sent in by Lauren, from Yahoo Answers user Grimace, who asks: Hunting: we are getting pizza for dinner? Hey guys, it's Gary. We are getting pizza. My parents, my four siblings, and my brother's girlfriend, and of course, my grandpa and grandpa, since they live here, all will be eating pizza hut. 47:22–Y–Sent in by Merit Palmer, from Yahoo Answers user Memeticklefarsan, who asks: How do I force my cat to have dinner with me? Audience Questions 50:50–How do I get over the guilt of having to put pins into a cartoon character's butt? I make character costumes for theme parts for a living, so when children pull on tails they don't pull the back off the character, I have to put velcro in their butthole, and I feel bad about putting pins in their butt.–Christian 54:37–I work nights at a pizza place and we have arcade fun time stuff, and that includes a candy crane that is unreasonably difficult, and it's a play till you win sort of thing, try fail try fail. It keeps going and keeps playing this insanely loud obnoxious music. So a lot of times kids will load in several rounds of playing and fail too long, and then their pizza comes so they abandon ship and the music keeps going and going. It's a small building, and crew and people in the building just start to slowly lose their goddamn minds. So to kill the beast I'll take a moment to go over and try to win. It usually takes me a few bits but I do it. Anyway, so sometimes I win a lot of candy, which I kind of want. Super good. But then sometimes the families will be at a nearby table watching me do their work for them, and I usually instead of taking it out immediately leave it in the machine like I didn't want it, and then come back later for it. (Is this cool?)–Ella 1:00:15–My dad offered me weed, and I am wondering if this is a trap.–Fawn 1:05:27–''I need to hide an elderly person for about an hour for work. Advice?–''I work at a retirement community, and we have what is known as a code pink, which is fun, it's like hide and seek, and we do have to drill it sometimes, and I have been tasked next week with drilling a code pink, which is a missing elder.–Sam 1:11:09–Housekeeping and also lighting problems 1:13:49–FY–Sent in by Michelle, from Yahoo Answers user s02, who asks: Why does Eminem hide his smile? Quotes ''Everybody used to call me dude, now everybody calls me sir/Just because I abandoned my T-shirt for a white button-down shirt/Traded in my beat up VW for a brand new BMW/Call me what you want but I would prefer if you just called me the dude–''Justin McElroy, "Living That Dude Life" (to the tune of Billy Joel's "It's Still Rock N' Roll To Me") You know, that was so fun, writing that song for y'all on spur of the moment. Sometimes that incredible talent that my friend Lin and I share, being able to improvise songs in the moment, is not so great. Me and my immediate family flew into San Jose, and we arrived at 10:30 PM here, which to me was 1:30 at home, and which to my kids was HELL. And they were demons, and I was just in it, and I got finally laid down at midnight, or 3:00 my time, put my head on the bed at - the hotel that we're staying at. Nice try, perverts! Put my head on the pillow and I'm about to drift off to dreamland, and my brain's like "Justin, hey Justin, are you still up?" I said, "Actually, brain, I'm trying to go to sleep." And my brain's like, "Okay, well, check this out. (to the tune of the Pina Colada song) IF YOU LIKE IMPORTED MANGA! Hey, Justin, is that anything?" I said, "I don't think so, brain." And my brain's like "Are you sure? Listen. IF YOU LIKE IMPORTED MANGA! It could be something, right?" "I don't actually think so, brain." "Okay, I'll tell you what. Let's make a deal. I'm just gonna repeat that for the next 45 minutes and we'll see if we get just even like a second line of that parody. Just a single rhyme to 'IF YOU LIKE IMPORTED MANGA!' And maybe it's a whole thing you could do, but anyway, I'll keep working on it, you just lay there awake for sure and I'll see what I can cook up for you." And it turned out the answer was nothing, friend. There's not a second line to that tune! - Justin Category:Episodes Category:Munch Squad Category:Face 2 Face Category:Riddle Me Piss Category:Graham Roebuck Category:Merit Palmer